A kind soft voice turneth away wrath.

From: Glenn Jacobs
Date: 3/29/2009 3:41:48 PM
To: lolyn123@comcast.net
Subject: kind voice


Forwarded from Duane Smith by Glenn Jacobs


THE POWER OF A KIND VOICE


When I was much younger and working my way through school, I was working in a deli shop in a place that was a popular lunch spot for business people in the neighborhood because of our quick service and specialty sandwiches.

During the lunch hour, the line formed rather quickly, and I was the person at the front taking the orders while also preparing sandwiches. Our customers were used to the routine --- I would look up and ask them for their order when I was ready.

One day, while I was working on a sandwich, the next person in line barked his order at me very loudly and before I was ready. My immediate thought was, "Who does this guy think he is?" and I couldn’t believe how rude he was. But when I looked up all ready to bark back at him, I saw a young guy in a suit, thoroughly distracted, fidgeting with some papers, looking stressed out, and he wasn’t even looking at me.

The thought came to me that he must be having a very bad day, so I moved closer to the counter, looked straight at him and with the softest, warmest voice I could, asked him whether he wanted mustard or mayonnaise. I wasn’t sure how he would react, but he suddenly looked up at me as if he had just woke up, and then he answered me back softly and respectfully.

I noticed that the shoulders of everyone in line relaxed a little bit at this and the next few customers were extra polite that day.

This event took just a few seconds of one day, but the lesson I learned has stayed with me all my life. When someone speaks to us rudely, meanly or threateningly, our immediate reaction often is to respond in the same way. But I realized that we could also choose to respond differently.

By trying to understand the feelings of this person, I was able to "get over" the way he talked to me and respond kindly to him. And perhaps that helped him to feel relieved, even if just for a short time, of whatever problems or stresses he had been under.

So often we go through our daily habits, usually in a great rush, and we forget to make real eye-to-eye contact with the people we interact with each day. This day, I was thrilled by the simple fact that we could all change someone’s day and our day, too, by simply speaking with a kind voice.