Friendshipping skills

Gina yelled, "hey, give me back my ball!"
Steven ran with the ball and hid.
"Teacher, Steven took my ball."


Steven, Why did you take Gina's ball?" teacher asked.

Steven looked at the floor.
"I wanted to play with it."

Steven, teacher said, "there are ways to ask for things,
that will help you get what you want
without making people unhappy."

"Tell me how." Steven demanded.

Well, for one, you need to know what you want.
And then, you look around and see if someone has it.
Then, you go up close to the one who has it,
you call them by name,
to be sure they know you are talking to them
you look right at the person.

When he looks back at you, and lets you know
he is listening,
you ask him for what you want,
you say, "Gina, can I play with the ball.?"

Now, Gina knows what you want, and that
you are being nice about it.

She might say, OK, or she might just say, NO.

If she says OK, they you get to play with the ball.
And then you tell him thank you,


OK I'll try it.

I think I want to play with the jump rope.
Let me see, who is playing with a jump rope.
There are not any left in the toy box.
Brent is playing jump rope,
maybe he will let me play with his rope.

Brent, I have to remember to call him by name.
Then I need to remember to get up real close and look right athis face.
Brent, could I play with your jump rope?
Sure, I'm going to play on the merry go round.
Great, thanks.
Ok, teacher, what if they say NO?

Well, then you stop and think, is there a reason?
and you ask, Why won't youlet me.

They might have a reason that you can fix.
I still want to play with it,
and you can ask if you can share.

And they might let you play with them, which would probably bemore fun anyway.

They might be afraid you will not give it back,
or maybe you would break it.

If that is their reason,
promise them that you will not keep it or break it.
Make sure you keep your promise so they will trust you.

I'm going to see if that works.

I want to play with a ball, but there are no more balls in thetoy box, I look and see that Ben is playing with a ball.
I go up close, look him in the face and ask,
calling him by his name, Ben,
could I play with your ball.
IF ben says, NO,
I can say, "why won't you let me play with the ball."
Ben says, "you might not give it back, and I want to play with itsome more.
Well, could we share? I could ask first.
No, I don't like to share.
Please let me play with the ball.
No.
Why not.
Because you might not give it back.
I promise I'll give it back. Please let me have a turn.
OK. You can play with it for a few minutes,
then I want it back.
OK. I promise.
Then I have to be sure to keep my promise and give it back so hewill trust me.


Wow, that worked great.
What happens if he still says no.
Well, then you can look around and see what else there is to playwith.
Or you can look around and see who else is playing with a ball
and ask them if you can play with it o share.
Sometimes just waiting a few minutes will solve the problem,someonw will put a ball back, or decide to share with you.
If that does not work, you can ask for help from a teacher orÜj______ÜŒother grown up.
Sometimes other children do not even know how to share and theyneed a grown up to help them learn how.
So If you cannot solve the problem,
look for something else to do,
or look for someone else to share with
If those things don't work for you,
wait a little while and see if things change,
and if nothing works for you,
ask for help from a grown up.